The bitchy talks, the jealous stare. Funniest part? YOU THINK I CARE
I still remember how it felt like, to be inferior and invisible, being afraid of locking into your own world, befriending your own confidence because it’s the only thing left and imposing fake toughness because it’s the only choice you have.
I know, it was not cool being alone. But it made me realize that it was way “COOLER” than being a phantom, always trying to hide your abandonment by the moving crowd.
Before moving in to Pampanga, I have brought and prepared a lot of “things” that I thought I will need. These included a lot of courage, attitude and power. And no, they are not the ones you see on TV but these are the ones I have been trained for when I was still a froshie (or I think I have been trained for at some particular sense). It never came to me that diverting my breadth would also affect the way I look at things. I admit, my past life will always be something I am not delighted to share with the whole world but I guess it just made me a whole lot better and I will forever be grateful for that. As shabby as it would sound but it really had an aftermath pertaining to how I positively perceive the world today. It took me a lot of time and a whole lot of sacrifices but I guess they are all worth it. I dropped off the cynical act, the awfully discouraging vents and all those hatred in me and it felt great. Releasing negative vibes like they had not been a part of my way-of-living is something, if I may say… intoxicating.
My point? DROP THE ACT. Take it from me, I have learned it the hard way and believe me, a strong ego only encompasses certain angst and everybody would really love it if you would just STOP AND DROP THE ACT. I wrote this post not to vent, not to spread rumours and develop an antagonistic view of somebody, but I wrote this because I want to change a life. Or at least, somebody’s view of life.
Second point: THINK. Negative thinking? You hate or should I say, TWEET that you hate back-stabbers but look at what you are doing now. Those craps will just ruin your day. I mean, aren’t they already ruined? You’re already pissed even without someone annoying you. You’re already annoyed by your own thoughts. Nobody even asked for your point, though it’s much healthier if you did vent it into something more dynamic (Like the one you did and yes. DYNAMIC. Google it. LOLJK). Besides, it will definitely push through in your aura and that is something nobody wants. I just wish you’re aware with what you’re saying. I have been there and I have done that. I think that should give me the just to compare things more clearly.
Proud to say but I have recovered from being “that f*cking bitch” who everyone hates to “that funny bitch” that everyone knows. Maybe there are just some rough circumstances that you SHOULD REALLY GO THROUGH. It’s not nice while I was on the process but look where it lead me? Not that great, yeah, but at least I’m over that player-hater attitude I had, only years ago.
Should I say more? I guess I will just leave the rest to your imagination and let you do a little thinking for yourself.